I don’t need another
like I had, I need
that something that
makes me write like I have
peeled back my fingernails
to unclot the ink underneath.
That’s how you know.
I don’t need you
but I want you
and the wanting is so much better, anyway,
any of my home movies can tell you:
I had this script in my stomach
and all her lines were in my pancreas
but I dizzied my body to death
on sorrow and sorries.
I retched bile onto my
clean-pressed love scheme.
I am someone new now.
This is a new body for you to hold.
No one has ever met this man, did you know?
I love myself enough now to let me love you,
I am done with the saboteur in my ripe young age.
You have that laugh that tastes like
you push your hair behind your ear when I
hold your gaze and you smirk and look away
and I still watch you from behind my glass,
Put a penny in the well,
wishing you’d think of me.
Lit a candle,
pushed my prayers out the door on a breeze to find where you worry.
I am not waiting,
I am not paused,
I am present.
Save me a dance
the next night of your life.